Your words are wonderfully stated and allows all groups, no matter what race they are show, that love can be found. You and your spouse have survived many years together as friends, family members, spouses, parents and finally a loving team. You should and must be commended for being an instrument of love and dedication to the rest of the world.
Although your love and steady dedication to one another is exemplary. I really do wish, you were a constant normality in life. We are all in one way or another constantly striving for even a shadows length of happiness and longevity in love that the two of you have enjoyed for more than a decade.
Please keep the knowledge and success of your love known to us all. It is always good to hear about the successes of others.
Thank you for sharing your wealth with us all.
From: Just For Birds <justforbirds@telus.net>
Subject: [asianamericanromance] My 25 cents worth
To: asianamericanromance@yahoogroups.com
Date: Thursday, March 11, 2010, 1:05 AM
I am married to my Thai wife for 15 years.
We have a great life.
Two wonderful, smart, good looking kids who are the tops of their class.
For me; when I started looking; I was 39 years old, never married.
Lots of dating, of course.
But; never that special one.
I ended up living in the San Francisco/Bay area.
I found, at the age of 39; it was difficult to meet a woman who had not been married or didn't have a lot of "baggage".
I did date women with kids; always the same comment: "Well; you could never be their dad. They have a dad"
Or; I had to bear the anger they held from prior relationships.
Geeze: I just gave up.
So; I decided I just really wanted to get married and signed up for several of the "mail order bride" type magazines.
This being before the internet stuff.
I wrote to well over 100 ladies, but; married almost the 1st one that wrote back.
We wrote for about 6 months, I went to meet her and we wrote for 3 more years.
For me; I like the way Asian women move.
They have this casual way about them when they move their hands or just turn around.
The shape of the eyes, the shiny black hair.
It is a gestalt of movement.
Many men think they are going to "save" an Asian lady from their culture of servitude
to men and likely think they will be on the receiving end of a fair amount of servitude gratitude and adoration.
Listen to the words in the song "My China Doll" by David Bowie.
I could escape this feeling
With my China Girl
I feel a wreck without my
Little China Girl
I hear her heart beating
Loud as thunder
Saw their stars crashing
I'm a mess without my
Little China Girl
Wake up mornings where's my
Little China Girl
I hear her heart's beating
Loud as thunder
Saw their stars crashing down
I feel a-tragic like I'm Marlon Brando
When I look at my china girl
I could pretend that nothing really meant too much
When I look at my china girl
I stumble into town just like a sacred cow
Visions of swastikas in my head
Plans for everyone
It's in the whites of my eyes
My little china girl
You shouldn't mess with me
I'll ruin everything you are
I'll give you television
I'll give you eyes of blue
I'll give you a man who want to rule the world
I think many of us go into this thinking we will be saviors only to become enslaved by our own innate needs.
For me; I discovered that the petite girl of my dreams had as good or better an education than I did.
Her ability to manage money (and me) has made us financially stable.
She is strong emotionally and morally.
Many times I am humbled and must strive to keep up.
And; the sense of family. Her family loves me and I am welcome at any time.
There is no bickering in her family that is often the case in a NA family.
In North America our families are all disparate entities; split up and going our own ways.
We've had a good 15 years; no fights, some sadness (deaths in the families), but: a lot of great times, memories and shared endeavors.
The best is that rather than (like many NA women) worrying about the break up or dissolution of the marriage/relationsh ip (the glass is ½ empty); I think Asian women think the other way; how the marriage/relationsh ip will work (the glass is ½ full). And so: for me: I ended up with a full partner who is headed in the same direction I am with significantly similar goals and morals.
My advice would be to set aside any pre-conceived notions you all might have and concentrate on being the best you can be for the person you have decided to look for.
You will likely get more than you bargained for; like catching ahold of a tigers tail.
Be prepared to meet the challenge.
If you are financially or morally bankrupt; it won't work.
It's not working for you now; so: why share your misery?
I had to straighten out my life somewhat before I took on the writing and before I could contemplate being a husband.
But; in the end: what I have is like I won a lottery.
So: that's my thoughts.
Jerry in Canada.
From: asianamericanromanc e@yahoogroups. com [mailto:asianameric anromance@ yahoogroups. com] On Behalf Of Khwan
Sent: Wednesday, March 10, 2010 2:36 PM
To: asianamericanromanc e@yahoogroups. com
Subject: [asianamericanroman ce] Re: Couples Questions or Problems or Discussions?
JUST for BIRDS Ltd.
www.justforbirds. net
justforbirds@ telus.net
EXTINCT is FOREVER
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